Excerpts from the book Boy Meets Girl by Joshua Harris:
The evil in our desire typically does not lie in what we want, but in that we want it too much. God mercifully uses the difficult experience of having this desire denied to show us that we want it too much. We should just trust in God for our ultimate satisfaction.
Letting go of relationships is not easy, especially if the emotional attachments are strong. Can we change our feelings and emotions? Yes, we can. But first we need to change the way we think about the person. Then our emotions and feelings will follow.
Clair says, “For two years I’d been thinking of him as my potential husband rather than a brother in the Lord. I had to renew my thinking and release my ‘claim’ on him. When feelings for him would resurface, I could usually pinpoint the cause as wrong thinking.”
Things didn’t change overnight, but slowly Claire’s feelings for him subsided. “God used that time to teach me to trust Him with my heart – to believe that if the relationship with this person wan’t his plan, He would help take it away and change my heart. And He did. He took the feelings away.”
(Philippians 4:6-7) Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
“God, I don’t want to be anxious about this area of my life. I present my requests to you. But I’m trusting Your Word, which says that Your peace, which transcends understanding, will guard my heart. I want Your peace, not the peace I attempt to create.”
If we just allow God, He will change us. Even though we’re not aware of it, even though we feel sometimes that our life is on hold, God is steadily doing an important work in our hearts. We should grow to trust God more than our own meticulous planning. We should bring our requests to God with joy and thankfulness instead of desperation or complaining.