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i understand. i didn’t really expect that it will push through anyway. our relationship has too many complications. and as much as i want to be with you, i’ve learned that we can’t really have everything we want. i know that everything happens for a reason, and there are things in life that we can’t control. i can’t force you to do something that you don’t want to do. i thought that loving you was enough, i hoped that my love, OUR love, could make everything right. but i guess it’s not really meant to be. it hurts, but i have to accept it. i wish i could stop loving you, then maybe things will be easier. i knew it was a mistake right from the start. we had the right love at the wrong time. i just don’t know why i held on for so long. maybe because every time i look at you, my heart is filled with so much love that i can’t imagine my life without you. but i guess there comes a time in a person’s life when everything becomes clear. and you realize that there are things that even love can’t conquer. i don’t know where we go from here. but i want you to know that i love you. i will never stop loving you. and maybe, somewhere down the road… our paths will cross again…

(P.S. I wrote this a few months back, intending to give it to my ex, but I didn’t have the courage to do it. So it stays here… where it belongs.)

Copyright©2008angel

The HammeRuler is a new invention that is a ruler and a hammer all rolled into one. It’s supposed to increase working efficiency as it cuts down tool switching when doing short measures. What do you think of this new tool?

It’s actually quite sad that I needed to experience a breakup to realize my self worth. You know what they say, “You can’t really love someone else without loving yourself first.” Well, I’ve learned that lesson the hard way.

One of the positive things that resulted from my recent breakup is my new found attitude towards myself. Now, I’m learning to love myself more. I’ve learned how important it is to take care of myself.

The breakup was a tough thing to accept, but I’ve come to terms with it. Slowly, I’m trying to adjust myself to a single life, a life without that person that I’ve been so used to having around. It’s a huge adjustment, especially since my whole world revolved around that person. But I know I have to focus on the good things instead of the bad. Or else I’ll just find myself miserable.

There are a lot of things that I learned actually. I cried, I went through a grieving period, but then one day I just got tired of it, and decided it’s time to move on. From then on, I vowed to focus on myself more. I promised to do things for myself this time… to start doing the things that I’ve always wanted to do but haven’t done because I was tied to a relationship.

For so long, I’ve taken myself for granted. When I was in a relationship, it was always the other person who has to come first. It was my choice really, though I know now what I did was wrong. In whatever decision I made, I had to think about this other person first. He became my priority, and I guess I lost myself along the way.

But now, I’m starting to find myself again. I know it won’t be easy, in fact, I know it’s going to be really hard. But I’m ready for it. I have to be. There’s no other choice.

Have you experienced setting yourself aside for a person you loved?

Copyright©2008angel

• Once I loved, I believed, I trusted. I failed, I cried, I moved on. Then I loved again. I invested, I exerted, I hoped, I fought. But eventually, I became weak, I got tired, I let go. Love doesn’t always succeed. But it always teaches us to let go if we can no longer hold on.

• I don’t know why we all hang on to something we know we’re better off letting go. It’s like we’re scared to lose what we don’t even really have. Some of us say we rather have that something than absolutely nothing. But the truth is: to have it halfway is harder than not having it all.

• I believe the saddest thing in life, is caring so much for someone and then one day you look into their eyes and listen to them talk and realize that they are gone. All you see in front of you is a stranger with just a known name.

• I wish my brain had a map to tell me where my heart should go.

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Imagine going to heaven and standing by God as He lovingly shows you the calendar of His plan for your earthly life. It begins with the day you are born. Once you received Christ as Savior, every day that follows is outlined in red. You see footprints walking through each day of each week of your life.

On many of the days, two sets of footprints appear. You inquire “Father, are those my footprints on the calendar every day and is the second set of prints when you joined me?”

He answers, “No, My precious Child. The consistent footprints on your calendar are Mine. The second set of footprints are when you joined Me.”

“Where were You going, Father?”

“To the destiny I planned for you, hoping you’d follow.”

“But, Father, where are my footprints all those times?”

He answers, “Sometimes you went back to look at old resentments and habits while I was still going forward, hoping you’d join Me. Sometimes, you departed from My path and chose your own calendar instead. Other times, your footprints can even be seen on another person’s calendar because you thought you liked their plan better. At other times, you simply stopped because you would not let go of something you could not take to the next day.”

“Father, what are those golden treasure boxes on certain days?”

“Blessings, My Child, I had for you along the way. Those that are open are those you received. Those still closed were days you did not walk with Me.”

“But, Father, we ended up OK even if I didn’t walk with You every day, didn’t we?”

He holds you close and smiles, “Yes, Child, we ended up OK. But, you see, OK was never what I had in mind for you.”

Author Unknown 

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I just found out today that a schoolmate of mine back in high school was diagnosed with a tumor and is to undergo a very delicate operation. The tumor is located in the middle of his brain stem and his spinal chord. His neurosurgeon said that it can be removed with 90% assurance and 10% risk. The risk being that if one of his brain stem or spinal chord is touched or damaged, he might end up paralyzed or placed in a respirator. He’s asking for help in the form of prayers, that the operation will be successful and he will have a full recovery.

I felt awful and sad when I heard this news. I realized that life really is too precious and too short to waste. Oftentimes, we get so caught up with our everyday lives, our busy schedules, our day-to-day problems, that we can’t even take the time anymore to enjoy and appreciate LIFE itself. I mean, how many times do we actually pause each day and just thank God for our health, well-being, and the blessings that we receive?

Most of us get so worked up with even the pettiest of problems, and even experience self pity because we feel like we have the biggest problem in the world. But sometimes we forget to be thankful for the most important blessing of all, our HEALTH. Instead of complaining about how unfair our lives are, we should just be thankful because we’re lucky to be alive and healthy.

With that said, let me just take this time to thank GOD for my HEALTH, FAMILY, FRIENDS, JOB and for all the blessings He has given me. Guys, treasure and make the most out of your life. Remember, life is too short, and we only have ONE life to live… don’t waste it.

Copyright©2008angel

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door. Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water.

She thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it slowly, and then asked, “How much do I owe you?”

“You don’t owe me anything,” she replied. “Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a kindness.”

He said….. “Then I thank you from my heart.” As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit.

Year’s later that young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes. Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room.

Dressed in his doctor’s gown he went in to see her. He recognized her at once. He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to the case.

After a long struggle, the battle was won. Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him for approval.

He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill was sent to her room. She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill.

She read these words…..

“Paid in full with one glass of milk”

(Signed)
Dr. Howard Kelly

Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed: “Thank You, God, that Your love has spread abroad through human hearts and hands.”

Author Unknown

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